Granada Hills North and South Neighborhood Councils Vote To Rumble At Midnight

Escalating tensions between the Granada Hills North and South Neighborhood Councils came to a head last night when both councils approved motions to engage in a rumble at midnight tonight. The rumble will occur under the 118 freeway underpass at Chatsworth Street just west of Sepulveda.

GHSNC President Dave Beauvais, urging the council to approve the motion, said "They might ask for blades, zip guns. And we've got to be prepared."

GHSNC President Dave Beauvais

The motion was seconded by Outreach Coordinator Sean "Rocket" Rivas, but the approval was almost derailed by objections from Jerry "Action" Askew, who questioned fellow council members' enthusiastic engagement in the turf battle, urging them instead to "make nice with the NN's." Askew's objections were overridden by a majority of council members, who voted overwhelmingly to "mix."

Sue DeVandry of Granada Hills North Neighborhood Council had to overcome similar objections at GHNNC's discussion of the matter, but eventually garnered unanimous support. "The Snakes (the moniker of the Granada Hills SNC) keep coming. They multiply like cockroaches. They're eating all the food, they're breathing all of the air. We fought hard for this turf, and we aren't just going to give it up."

GHNNC President Leon Marzillier
Council member Kim Thompson said of the plan, "We're going to speed fast, we're going to move like lightning, and we're going to clean up those Snakes once and for all, so they're never going to set foot on our turf again."

After the vote, the council welcomed their guest speaker, Officer Krupke of LAPD's Devonshire Division Police Department, who sanctioned the rumble, but advised the counsels, "You want to kill each other, go ahead, kill each other. But you ain't gonna do it on my beat."

click here for video of the meeting


  1. That's right. I'm here to protect my turf now. We can't keep them off of Balboa and they keep invading Sugar Suite on GHNNC night. We've had it.

    Last night at the meeting, I was distracted by Leon's white pants. But I voted anyway. I'll be packing. Anne Ziliak promised to get on the shoulders of Bill Hopkins and squawk like a chicken when Jerry Askew tries to back out. Joe Vitti abstained on this vote.

    We're ready to rumble and we're not scared of any Officer Krupke, but we still moved it a street away to the Mission Division.

    See you at midnight Dave and Sean... and be scared. Be very scared.

  2. Bring it on! GHNNC is ready to rumble! Wayde Hunter has sounded the trumpets. Jan Subar is ringing the bells. Agnes Lewis is ready on her horse to take on the GHSNC "Snakes". Get on the cell phones and call all GHNNC Stakeholders, especially those who are trained in MMA and kickboxing, to come out and defend our turf. Neysa Frechette is rounding up the Kennedy High School cheerleaders to cheer us on. Victory is ours!

    Sue DeVandry
    GHNNC Outreach Chairperson

  3. Bring it, blondie...

  4. HAHAHA! I love April Fools Day!!


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Archive: Master of Pirates

Thoughts on Joe's Cafe and cancel culture

Even XXX Stars Need TLC