There's No Such Thing As A Free Lunch At The Odyssey

I just received a bulk-mailed postcard with a "special invitation" to have a "Complimentary Gourmet Meal" at The Odyssey. Here's the menu:

Fresh fruit & domestic cheeses with crackers

First Course
Fresh California Tossed Green Salad
With house vinaigrette and ranch dressing on the side

Combination Dinner of
Filet Mignon

Boneless Breast of Chicken Marsala
Oven brown rosemary potatoes and seasonal mixed vegetables

Carrot Cake

But before you can dig in, you'll have to sit through "some meaning information with none of the usual financial doubletalk" on the topic of "Exposing the myths of retirement plans."

The card says they "will provide you with beneficial information followed by a delicious meal." They also threaten to let you know about "THE BEST IRA IN AMERICA."

This postcard also warns that if you call the 800 number to make a reservation, "a licensed insurance agent may contact you."

Do extended insurance sales pitches lull you into a tranquil, hypnotic state -- especially when delivered immediately before dinner?

Are you willing to feign interest in a "Workshop and Insurance Sales Presentation presented by Freedom Dream Team" just to get a free meal?

Are you willing to forego showering for a week so that the Freedom Dream Team will subject you to a minimum of pestering?

If any of these apply to you, call 1-800-275-2293. Operators are standing by. These operators will try to weed you out. If they ask, tell them you are a multi-millionaire who has yet to purchase any sort of insurance.

Yum -- carrot cake!


  1. Guess the Odessy's not getting the bar mitzvah business it used to. The bright side: At least it's not a Vegas time share lecture.


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